Work-life balance is a trending subject, with many claiming it to be the key to mental well-being. However, after experiencing both the corporate grind and the entrepreneurial route, seeking balance has more often than not led me to burnout and frustration rather than providing a solution to my problems. Let me explain why and share what has actually worked for me.

"Work-Life Balance" term popularity on Google over time.

The myth of work-life balance

The idea of work-life balance implies that work and personal life are opposing forces, battling for equal attention. However, work is not a separate entity; it's an integral part of life itself. Cooperation for resource generation has been a fundamental human activity since the origin of the species — and what is work if not this?

Viewing work as something you do when you're not truly living goes against human nature and can lead to resentment and psychological suffering. (This perspective is brilliantly explored in the dystopian TV show Severance, a must-watch for any sci-fi thriller fan like myself).

Life is not a scale, but a railway track

Think of life as a railway track, not a balancing scale. Rails run parallel to enable trains to move smoothly. If one rail veers slightly to the right and you try to "balance it out" by slightly adjusting the other rail to the left, the increased friction will slow down the train and may eventually derail it. Similarly, in life, I've observed that those who strive to align their work and personal life tend to move forward smoothly. On the other hand, those who constantly attempt to "balance things out" often end up burnt out and derailing.

Work shouldn’t be something to run away from, but a stimulating and meaningful activity. If it isn't, you have two options: either change what you are working on so that it aligns with your personal goals and values, or revise your goals and values accordingly.

Finding the way

If you are uncertain about your goals and values or need guidance in adjusting them, some practices that have worked for me and those around me include journaling, talking with a therapist, having a chat with a close friend or your partner, and exploring stimulating books (not just non-fiction, there are plenty of novels that can be helpful too — feel free to hit me up if you need recommendations).

If on the other hand, you are stuck in a job you hate and feel like you have no other choice, it's crucial to consider first if there really are no alternatives. Sometimes, there are options available, but they are tougher, riskier, or less convenient. My advice here is to always prioritize alignment above anything else. If no other alternatives really exist, start by questioning why you hate your situation so much — you are already on the best possible path that is available to you. Reflecting on stoic literature, like Marcus Aurelius' Meditations, can be incredibly helpful in such situations. If you are doing everything necessary to get where you want to be, then you are on the right track.

Think qualitatively, not quantitatively

When dealing with challenges derived from managing life inside and outside of work, people often think in quantitative terms — "I need more days off", "I need to work fewer hours". From my experience, thinking in qualitative terms proves to be more beneficial — "Am I working on what truly matters to me?”., "Is my personal life in sync with my aspirations?", "Do my professional goals complement my personal goals?".

These questions are tough to answer and may not have straightforward solutions, but ignoring them and taking a few days off as a temporary fix will merely mask deeper issues brewing underneath the surface.

Let me be clear; I’m not saying you shouldn’t take breaks, go on vacations, or enjoy some downtime. But using these distractions as an excuse to evade important introspection can mess with your long-term happiness and fulfillment.

So that's why I don't believe in work-life balance. If you've made it this far, thanks for reading.